Drabble 72 | Then & Now (Part 2)
Jul. 8th, 2010 12:16 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
sanalayla February 2008
Clark walked into the kitchen, while wiping his hands on the dirty towel he’d brought from the barn. He’d thought that working on the tractor would help clear his mind, but – instead – all it had done was leave him to dwell on his conflicted thoughts. The normally soothing activity had seemed pointless and he’d given up.
“You’re back,” Lana said, as she closed the oven door and straightened. She gave him a tremulous smile, which didn’t quite reach her eyes. “How’s the tractor?”
Clark looked at her for a moment and then answered, tersely. “It’s fine.” He felt bad when the smile dropped from her lips and she looked sad. So, he added, in a softer tone, “I doubt I’ll ever get it to work. But I can’t help but try.”
Letting out a mirthless laugh, Lana shook her head. “Sounds like you’re talking about more than the tractor, Clark.”
“What?” Confused, for a second, Clark just stared at her. Then, he realized she was referring to their relationship and he let out a sigh. “No, that’s not what I --.”
“It’s okay, Clark,” Lana interjected. She took the dishtowel that rested on the island and started twisting it in her hands. “I know it’s hard, but… I want you to know that I’m trying. As much as I can.”
“I know you are, Lana,” Clark answered, letting out a weary sigh. “I just….”
Clark stopped, because he wasn’t exactly sure how to complete the sentence. What did he want to say, anyway? Every fiber in his being just wanted to wrap his arms around her and tell her it was going to be all right. That they could get past this, just like they’d gotten past every other obstacle. But his legs wouldn’t move and his arms remained stiff at his side. Something was stopping him, and he had no clue what it was.
Lana seemed to recognize his inner turmoil. She looked up at him with wide, anxious, eyes. “Clark. I love you. That has to count for something.”
“It does.” Clark glanced around the immaculate and spotless kitchen, avoiding her gaze. He saw two pies resting on the counter and he decided to change the subject. “You made pie?”
Seeming to sense that he didn’t want to talk about their relationship, Lana nodded and attempted levity. “Yes. Your mom’s recipe. I know you love her apple pie, but I felt like blueberry. So, I made both!” Again, she smiled at him, but it was clearly forced. “They should be cool now, if you want a slice.”
“No, I’m not hungry,” Clark responded, almost automatically.
A flash of pain flickered in her eyes. “But I made it for you.”
Feeling bad that he’d hurt her feelings, he amended, “Um, maybe later. We haven’t even had dinner, yet.”
Before Lana could answer, there was a loud knocking on the door. It was followed by Lois’s voice, calling out, “People, I’m coming in. And there better be pants on everyone!” In her typical style, Lois pushed the door open and came barging in, talking a mile a minute. “Because, seriously, the last thing I need is that mental image seared into my retinas. So, fair warning, folks!”
“Lois, hi!” Lana offered Lois a genuine smile, with a slightly relieved expression.
“Lois.” Clark gave his friend an exasperated look. Other people entered a room. Lois? She made an entrance. “What are you doing here?”
“Gee, thanks.” Lois made a face. And then she held up a drill. “I came to return your drill.” With a proud grin directed towards Lana, she added, “I managed to put the chair together all by myself. See, Smallville? I told you that I didn’t need you.”
With a little laugh, Clark took the drill from her hands and made a show of looking it over for any damage.
“Hey! I took good care of it!” Lois exclaimed indignantly. “I told you I would.”
“Just checking,” Clark answered, with a grin. “Last time you borrowed something from my tool set, I got it back in four pieces.”
Lois rolled her eyes and ignored the barb. Mainly because she knew that he was right.
“Lois, do you want some pie?” Lana offered, with a gracious smile. She had clearly slipped into her hostess demeanor. “There’s plenty.”
“No, no, I’m good,” Lois responded, holding her hand up. But Lana had already started to take down the plates and to take out forks. So, Lois relented. “Um… okay, just a little.” She slid into the closest stool at the kitchen island.
“Which one do you want? I’ve made apple and blueberry.” The pie knife was Lana’s hand and she stood near the counters, looking at Lois with an expectant expression.
“Ahh…” It was clear Lois was taken aback that there was a choice. “I guess I’ll take the apple.”
Lana furrowed her brows in disappointment. “Are you sure? I picked the blueberries myself.”
“Oh, well, then, I guess I’ll --.”
“If she wanted blueberry, she would have asked for blueberry,” Clark cut in, before he could stop himself. With a tight smile in Lana’s direction, he added, “Most people know what they want and don’t need someone to explain to them what they want.”
Lana froze in place for a second, and then she returned his smile. Hers was equally tense. “Maybe she’s not aware of the options and she’s confused. Sometimes, it can be hard to know what you want and what you need. It’s not always such an easy choice.”
“Sometimes, it is an easy choice,” Clark shot back, now starting to feel annoyance get the better of him. “You just have to want to make it, Lana.”
Lois, whose head had been swiveling back and forth between them, chose that moment to intercede. “OK, THEN! You know what, guys? I’ll have both. I’ll just run an extra mile tomorrow. No biggie.”
Lana and Clark both blinked at her, having almost forgotten she was there. Lana let out a sigh. “Sure, I can give you both.”
There was silence in the room as Lana focused on getting slices of pie onto everyone’s plates and setting the kitchen island. While Lois took her first bit, Lana poured lemonade into three glasses and set them out, too.
After a moment, Lois looked up and said to Lana, with a warm smile, “It’s great, Lana. Now, I’m not going to say it’s as good as Mrs. Kent’s – because that’s the gold standard – but it’s up there.” Quickly, she took a sip of her lemonade and then shot Clark a curious look. “Smallville, aren’t you going to have any?” She gestured towards his untouched plate.
“Yeah, of course.” Clark forced a smile to his lips and took a small bite of the apple pie. It probably was good – Lana was an excellent cook – but, in that moment, it tasted like sawdust. But, out loud, he just said, “It’s good.”
Lana smiled at him and took a small bite of her own blueberry pie.
An awkward silence descended on the room, as Lois quickly shoveled down her pie. Both Lana and Clark were moving their dessert around in their plates more than they were eating it.
Since Clark was very familiar with the fact that Lois hated uncomfortable silences, he wasn’t surprised when she broke the silence to ask, “So, you guys planning any vacations this year? Any summer plans? The weather has been so horrible that I find the only thing keeping me sane is thinking about my bikini and where it’s going this summer.”
“I was thinking we could go to Paris,” Lana answered, slowly.
Clark blinked at her in confusion. This was the first he’d heard of this. “I don’t know. Maybe.”
“Why not, Clark?” Lana asked him, looking a bit annoyed. “I mean, I think it would be good for us to get away from here. From Smallville. It could do us some good.”
“I just don’t think it’s a good idea,” Clark answered, uneasily. “There’s the farm, so much to do.” He shrugged instead of finishing the rest, which was to say that he still had to figure out the situation with his powers. He couldn’t just up and run off on an impromptu vacation whenever he felt like it. “It’s not a good time.”
“When is a good time, Clark?” Lana voice had cooled by about a thousand degrees. “It’s never a good time.”
At that point, Lois jumped up from the island. “Smallville. Can I see you in the other room, for a second?” Without waiting for him to respond, she shot a big grin towards Lana, and almost forcibly dragged him into the living room.
“What?” Clark asked, when they’d finally come to a halt. He stared down at her in confusion.
Lois crossed her arms and looked up at him. “Look, Clark, I have no idea what’s going on between you two.” She held her hand up to cut him off before he could explain. “No, wait. As your friend, I’m telling you that you should take the girl to Paris.”
Clark let out a frustrated sound. “Lois. You have no idea --.”
“Look, Clark,” Lois interjected. “I know you don’t realize this, but I’m a girl.”
Clark almost snorted in amusement. He gave her a mock incredulous look. “No. Really?”
Lois made a face, as though she knew she’d walked into that one. “Anyway… I know that girls like to be romanced and wooed. Don’t just shut her out; if you want to keep her, try to give her what she wants.”
Clark gazed down at her suspiciously. “Since when do you care if I make things work with Lana?”
Something indefinable flashed in her eyes. After a second, it was gone and she was smiling at him again. And she said, smoothly, “I’m your friend. And friends don’t let friends go around making dumb decisions.” With a slight shrug, she leaned in and said, teasingly, “Besides, any girl that makes pie like that is definitely a keeper.” With a light punch to his arm, she moved past him to go out the front door. “See you around, Smallville.”
Hours after Lois had left, Clark lay down on the bed he shared with Lana, after trying to work himself into an exhaustion. It had been a futile effort, because sleep still proved elusive. He stretched out on his side of the bed and listened to the even breathing of the woman that lay next to him. There was only three feet of distance between them, but it may as well have been three miles. He wouldn’t reach out to touch her and he knew that she’d spend the whole night clinging to her edge of the bed, careful not to accidentally breach the distance between them.
As he stared at the moonlight streaking slates of light across his ceiling, his thoughts turned to his conversation with Lois and the advice she’d given him. After mulling it over, he let out a silent laugh and shook his head. He couldn’t believe he was actually considering taking romantic advice from Lois, of all people. She not only had a tendency to gravitate towards the worst possible men in the universe, she was also incapable of making a commitment to the one decent man she had found.
Feeling oddly comforted by the random thoughts about his aggravating friend, he fell asleep to the thought that it would be a cold day in hell before his love life would actually be impacted by Lois Lane’s opinion.
February 2011
Clark walked into the kitchen and did a double take. The place looked like a tornado of flour had been through it. Every available surface was covered with the white stuff and there were stacks of dishes in the sink, along with sugar and all kinds of baking materials spread out everywhere. Lois, herself, seemed to wearing as much flour as the kitchen.
“Lois?” Clark asked, feeling more than a little apprehensive. “What are you doing?”
She turned to face him, after shutting the door of the oven shut with her hip, and gave him a bright grin. “I’m baking a pie!” Lois announced.
“Okay….” Taking a deep breath, Clark mentally reviewed the events of the past twenty-four hours. Had he accidentally inhaled some form of Kryptonite again? Had she inhaled some form of Kryptonite? Was she on drugs?
Lois seemed to sense his fear, because she made a face and said, reassuringly, “No, it’s not like that. I’m making a pie to celebrate!”
“Celebrate what?” Clark asked, still dubious about her motives.
“We got out of the basement!” Lois ran up to him and gave him a hug, along with a quick kiss. Clark glanced down at his clothes and saw that he now wore quite a bit of her flour. “Perry just told me today.”
“We did?” Clark grinned down at her. Not that he cared all that much. It was a bigger deal for Lois to get out of the bullpen than it had been for Clark. But anything that made Lois’s eyes light up and sparkle like that definitely made him happy. “That’s great.” Casting a confused glance around the room again, he asked, “So you decided to celebrate by… baking a pie?”
“Not just any pie.” Lois pulled back and walked backwards towards the oven. Whirling around, she grabbed the oven mitts and opened the door, yanking out the oven rack. Taking the pie out of the oven, she held it up to him. “I got the recipe from your mom. It’s her apple pie you love so much.”
Clark leaned closer and analyzed the pie she held up. It looked normal. It actually wasn’t an interesting shade of charcoal, like most of Lois’s baking efforts usually were. But he couldn’t help but say, “Um… you really didn’t need to do that. We could have gone out for dessert….”
“Very funny, Smallville.” Lois made a face and set the pie down on a cooling rack. “I would have made you my famous rum cake, but someone doesn’t appreciate it as much as he should.”
“Lois, the pigs don’t appreciate your famous rum cake,” Clark pointed out, his lips curved into a wicked grin. “And they eat dirt.”
Lois rolled her eyes in response. Taking the pie knife in her left hand, she started cutting a couple of slices out.
“What are you doing?” Clark’s eyes widened in alarm. Was Lois actually serious about them having to eat it? At her dirty look, he amended, “I mean, it’s hot. We should wait until it cools down.”
Lois’s brows rose at that. “Clark, you’re impervious to pain. And you have super-breath. Just cool it down.”
Not finding any argument to that kind of logic, Clark just nodded. “Right.” Before taking a bite of it, though, he looked her over. He couldn’t help but trail a couple of fingers over her cheek and show her the flour. “Did you bake the pie or decide to take a bath in it?”
Lois looked at his fingers with some surprise. And then glanced down at her apron and messy jeans. “Um… I didn’t realize that.” She started to take off her apron and when the knot wouldn’t untie, she looked up at him. “A little help, please?”
Clark put his arms around to reach the knot and attempted to unravel it, but it was tied on tight. If he pulled more, he’d probably end up ripping it. “I can’t. Can I just tear it?”
“No!” Lois pulled back and tried to swipe his hands away. “It’s your mom’s.”
“I don’t think she’ll care, Lois,” Clark answered, giving the apron’s sash an experimental tug, with a grin. That brought her closer to him, flush up against his body. Suddenly, he wasn’t thinking about aprons and apple pie, anymore. “Let me help you out of it,” he said, in a husky whisper, as he leaned down to give her a kiss.
Lois pulled away before his lips could touch hers. “No way.” She gave him admonishing look and put her fingers on his mouth. “I know that look. It’s usually followed up by a trip upstairs that lasts for hours.”
“You say that like it’s a bad thing,” Clark responded, in a semi-teasing tone.
“I made you pie and you’re going to eat it,” Lois informed him. “It’s not every day that I actually exert myself to bake, you know.”
Considering her for a moment, Clark glanced down at the pie and then back at her. Before she could protest, he took the hand she still had placed on his mouth and guided it down until it hit his plate. Using his own hand to guide her, he scooped up some of the pie onto her fingers and then lifted them to his mouth. Slowly, he licked the filling off of her fingers, sucking on each of them for a second before letting her go. Never taking his eyes off of hers, he said, thoughtfully, “Best pie I’ve ever had.”
Lois let out an incoherent response and then, flushing a bit, cleared her throat. “Um….” Using her free hand, she took a forkful of pie and tried it. After a second of chewing, she coughed. “Smallville, there’s not enough sugar. And I think I went overboard with the salt.”
“Really?” Clark took some more of the pie in his own hand and then left a trail of the gooey filling down the side of her neck, leading down to the hollow of her throat. “Maybe it just tastes sweeter when it’s coming from you. I should check.” Without waiting for her response, he leaned down and licked all the way down until he’d cleaned every last inch off of her. She closed her eyes and swayed closer to him, her hands sliding up his chest and around his shoulders. “Hhhmm… no, still the best pie I’ve ever had.”
At that, Lois opened her eyes and pulled back. A smile playing around her lips, her eyes were sparking mischievously, as she shook her head. “Okay, then. Just rip it off.”
Clark didn’t wait for another invitation. With one arm, he grasped her around the waist and, with his free hand, he grabbed the pie off of the counter. Before she could let out a sound, he super-sped her up the stairs.
Hours later, Lois was snuggled into him and sleeping peacefully. Her head rested on his shoulder and her hand was splayed across his chest. Every once in awhile, she mumbled something inaudible and burrowed in closer, but didn’t wake up. Clark’s thoughts turned to how much she meant to him and he tried to imagine life without her. And realized that just the mere idea gave him chills.
Slowly and softly, so as not to wake her, Clark reached out and pulled open the drawer of his side table. From there, he pulled out a small, velvet box. Contemplating it for a second, he glanced down and saw that Lois was still sound asleep. Quickly, he snapped it open and pulled out the diamond ring that was nestled inside. The stone caught the meager light in the room and reflected it. Clark studied it and smiled, thinking about how excited his mother had been when she’d given it to him a week ago.
Lois’s left hand was resting on his chest and Clark shifted until he could grasp it with his free hand. He wasn’t exactly sure what got into him, but he had a compelling urge to see what she looked like wearing the ring. Since Lois was a pretty sound sleeper, he could probably slide it on and off without her being any the wiser.
After he’d put it on her ring finger, he felt a flare of possessiveness and pride. Both of which were probably emotions that Lois would kill him for having. Especially the first one. But he couldn’t help it. At that moment, as though she sensed that he was having thoughts she wouldn’t approve of, Lois woke up. Before he could grab the ring, she’d moved her hand away and was sitting up to blink down at him sleepily.
“Smallville?” Lois gazed down at him questioningly. “Why aren’t you asleep?”
“Um….” Involuntarily, his gaze strayed to her left hand.
And, then, of course, so did hers. Her eyes widened, almost comically, and she sat up all the way. She held up her hand, so she could stare at the ring. Swallowing a bit, she turned to look at him. “Is this a….?”
“I can explain,” Clark said, hastily, while he tried to figure out a way to explain.
Lois looked amused. “Am I to assume, then, that my opinion is actually irrelevant? Were you even planning on inviting me to the wedding?”
“Lois….” Clark opened his mouth to get her to understand, but then realized he had absolutely no explanation. So, he fell silent and held his breath, waiting for her response.
After a beat, Lois let out a laugh. And then leaned down to kiss him lightly. “Most girls would kill me for letting you off this easy. But, yes. I’ll marry you.”
Clark let out a huge sigh of relief. And then grabbed her to pull her down so he could kiss her more properly. As he flipped her over, so he was on top of her, a stray thought passed through his mind. About how – really – her opinion was the only one that was relevant, at all.
***
May 2009
Lois walked into the bullpen and saw that Clark was actually, amazingly, sitting at his desk. She couldn’t believe it. Shaking her head slightly, she walked up to him and plopped herself down on his desk, facing his chair. “Smallville, where the hell have you been?”
Clark gave her one of his inscrutable looks. The ones she was slowly coming to hate. Actually, quite quickly coming to hate. “Clark, what’s going on?” Lois asked, abruptly.
He looked surprised by her bluntness. “I don’t know what you mean.”
“Yeah, you do, Clark,” Lois answered, with an impatient sound. “You… you’ve been acting weird. And I never know where you are. I had to follow four stories on my own; you were nowhere to be found.”
Clark stood up and snapped, “Lois, we don’t have to be joined at the hip. And I haven’t been acting weird.”
Lois hadn’t been raised on army bases her whole life for nothing. Undaunted by his response, she crossed her arms and followed him to the coffee table. “You’ve totally been acting weird. At least, weird for you. And, yes, your bar is pretty high.”
Instead of eliciting a smile or even a pointed groan from him, it made him turn to face her and he said, testily, “Okay, then. Why don’t you leave to my weirdness?”
“Clark.” Lois tilted her head to the side and decided to take another approach. “Look, I can tell something’s bothering you. Why don’t you just talk to me about it? Maybe I can help you,” she added gently, putting her hand on his shoulder.
Clark stood still for a minute, his back turned to her. Then, he slowly turned around, and his face was a bit wooden as he said, “Lois, I am worried about something. But it’s none of your business.”
“Of course.” Feeling a flash of pain in her heart, Lois blinked away the sudden tears that had come to her eyes. Stepping back, as though he’d physically struck her, she took a deep breath and forced a bright smile to her lips.
His eyes filling with regret, Clark reached out to her and said, “Wait. I didn’t mean it like that.”
“No, you know,” Lois cut in, walking backwards away from him, her hands held up in the air. “Fair enough. I’ve actually been doing great with the solo assignments and, so, I think you’re right. You mind your business. I’ll mind mine.”
Without waiting for his response, Lois whirled around and hurried towards the steps, taking them two at a time as she left the bullpen – and Clark – behind. And, not for the first time, cursed herself for having the misfortune to fall in love with the one guy on the planet who was completely incapable of loving her back.
Hours later, she was tossing and turning in her bed when her phone rang. Frowning slightly, she checked the clock and saw that it was one in the morning. “What the hell?” She grabbed the phone on her bedside table and said, in a harsher tone than she usually employed, “Hello?”
There was silence for a second and then she heard a mechanical voice say, “Ms. Lane?”
Lois sat up the bed, a smile spreading across her face. “Yes? It’s you!”
There was a slight chuckle – or what Lois assumed to be a chuckle – and he confirmed. “Yes. It is.”
Even though it was ridiculous, since she knew he couldn’t see her, Lois ran her fingers through her hair, as though to fix it. “Um… so… what’s up?” Lois asked, a little lamely.
“Well, you said that if I ever just wanted to talk….”
“Yes,” Lois answered, breathlessly. She nodded and then remembered he couldn’t see her. “Um… yeah.”
“So, the offer’s still open?”
Lois grinned happily. “Of course. I’m right here.”
“Thanks.”
A silence stretched between them and then, finally, Lois prompted him. “So, what did you need to talk about?”
“I’m….” He hesitated and then he said, “What would you do if you knew someone who was making a terrible mistake? But if you tried to stop them, it would probably just make things worse?”
“Umm….” Lois blinked. That was probably the most vague hypothetical question she’d ever gotten in her life. “It depends. Is this mistake only going to hurt them? Or will it hurt other people, too?”
“It could hurt a lot of people.”
“Then, I would try to do everything in my power to stop them from making this mistake.” Lois paused and then added, thoughtfully, “Even if it meant that I wouldn’t have a relationship with that person anymore. Because saving people is more important than just one person.”
He was quiet for a minute and then he said, “Ms. Lane?”
“Yes?”
“You’re a really good person.”
Lois flushed and her heart flipped around in her chest. “Thanks, but you don’t really know me.”
“I know you.” He said and then he let out a little laugh. “And I know you don’t like compliments. But you are. I wanted you to know that.”
“Thank you.” Lois was touched and didn’t really know what else to say.
“All right, well, I should let you get back to sleep.”
“It’s okay, I was up,” Lois lied, smoothly.
He chuckled again. “I also know when you’re lying. Good night, Ms. Lane.”
“Good night,” Lois whispered.
Lois held the phone for a good minute or two even after she’d heard the click signaling that he’d hung up. Then, slowly, she turned it off and put it back down on her nightstand. Unbidden, a tear slowly ran down her cheek as she realized something.
She’d fallen in love with a man who was there, right in front of her, but emotionally unavailable. And, now, there was another man, who was ready to open up to her, but physically unavailable.
Letting out a dry laugh, Lois fell back against the pillow and told herself that she was dumbest person in the world. No wonder love was so elusive. She was hopeless.
May 2011
After typing up the final sentence of her article, Lois smiled in satisfaction at another story completed. She clicked on the print button so she could proof the draft in hard copy and then squinted when she saw a window pop up, telling her she had a new e-mail. She clicked on the mouse again, to pull it up and frowned when she saw that it was from Clark. The frown quickly turned into a grin when she read the message. Turn around.
Swiveling her chair around, Lois bit back a smile when she saw Clark standing a few feet away. He was holding a single red rose in his hand and his own smile widened when he saw her. Bounding to her feet, she closed the distance between them.
“For me?” Lois asked, indicating towards the rose.
“No. Actually, it’s for my fiancée,” Clark answered, in a mock serious tone. “Have you seen her?”
“No, I haven’t,” Lois responded, playing along. She grabbed the rose from him and buried her nose in its fragrance. “But I’m sure she won’t mind if I steal it from her.”
“Hhhmm… I don’t know.” Clark pretended to give it some thought. “She’s pretty feisty.”
One brow rose, as she appraised him over the flower. “Feisty? Really?”
Clark laughed. And then pulled her in for a hug. Lois snuggled into the warmth of his embrace for about thirty seconds and then moved back, since they were at the DP and it wasn’t a good idea to indulge in PDAs too much.
Gazing up at him, she gave him a proper greeting. “Hello.”
“Hi.” Clark stuck his hands in his pockets and stared down at her for a second and then asked, “So, we’re still on for tonight?”
Lois nodded. “Yup. You and me. Candlelight dinner.”
“Good.” Clark let out a relieved sigh. “This is the first meal we’ll have together in two weeks.”
“Two and a half,” Lois corrected him. And then gave him a wry smile. “Not that I’m keeping track.”
Clark opened his mouth to respond, but then he stopped. His head turned sharply to the side and he got that look on his face that Lois had become increasingly familiar with. Sure enough, he snapped out of it a few seconds later and turned to her with an apologetic look. “I hear police sirens and the ambulance. I better go check it out.”
“Of course.” In the amount of time it took to get the words out, Clark had already disappeared. With a bit of a sigh, she glanced down at the rose in her hand and added, “No problem.” Then she frowned, as she saw that there was a paper stuck to the stem of the rose.
She brought it closer and realized that Clark had wrapped a post-it around the stem, and there was something written on it. Taking care not to rip it, she pulled it away from the stem. And then smiled when she saw what he’d written.
It’s a beautiful rose. But the woman holding it is even more beautiful. I love you, Lois Lane.
Shaking her head slightly, she let out an embarrassed laugh. Her cheeks heated up as she looked around, hoping no one saw the very goofy expression on her face. The DP was, as usual, a whirlwind of activity, so no one was paying the least bit attention to her. Indulging herself, for just a moment, Lois lifted the rose and brushed it against her lips. And then whispered, “I love you, too, Clark Kent.”
Many hours later, she sat in the living room and flipped through the channels, anxiously trying to catch up with the news and trying to figure out where Clark was. The dinner had grown cold, long ago, and the candles had sputtered out. But she wasn’t focused on that. She was focused on trying to figure out where Clark had gone after he’d put out the fire, saved the people from the falling bridge, and then went over to Florida to help folks out with the hurricane.
Just as she was reaching for her phone to call Clark – even though she had a rule where she wouldn’t bother him while he was on Blur duties – she heard the front door open behind her. Letting out a huge sigh of relief, she jumped to her feet and whirled around to face him. And then blinked in dismay. He looked like he’d been through the ringer. His costume was filthy and dusty, with water stains. And he looked exhausted.
“Smallville!” Lois exclaimed and then hurried towards him. She threw her arms around him and he hugged her back. Pulling away, she said, “Um… don’t take this the wrong way, but you look like hell.” Then she wrinkled her nose. “You don’t smell all that great, either.”
“Gee, thanks.” Clark rolled his eyes. “There was a fire and then a bridge collapsed. And, then --.”
“The hurricane,” Lois interjected. “Yeah, I know.” Looking him up and down critically, she arrived an executive decision. “You go upstairs and shower; get changed. I’ll heat up the food I saved for you.”
“Lois, I’m not hungry,” Clark protested. “I just want to go to bed.”
Lois pursed her lips and glared at him. “I don’t care. You haven’t eaten since breakfast this morning. With your metabolism, you need to eat like a gazillion times a day. Just go upstairs, get changed, and I’ll put something together.” She gave him one of those looks where she made it clear that he may be the strongest person in the world, but she was the stubbornest.
Letting out a sigh of defeat, he blurred away to go change.
Minutes later, he came back downstairs, right as she was pulling his food out of the microwave. He glanced down at the roast and potatoes and made a face. “There is no way I’m eating that.”
Tilting her head to the side, she studied him for a moment. His eyes were a deeper green than usual and he looked incredibly tired. It was clear that he’d had a long and hard day. She chewed on her lip for a second and then, inspired, she grabbed the fruit bowl from the kitchen counter with one hand and grasped his hand with the other.
“Follow me,” Lois ordered, while pulling him into the living room.
Either Clark was too confused to argue or too tired but, either way, he complied without protest. It took some maneuvering, but Lois managed to settle down on the sofa, yanking Clark down at the same time, until he was lying down with his head resting comfortably on her lap and wedged under a cushion.
Finally, Clark looked up at her and asked, “What are we doing?”
“I’m going to feed you grapes,” Lois announced. She eyed the fruit bowl. “Um… and oranges. That way you don’t have to do any work.”
One corner of his mouth lifted up in a wry smile. “I take it I have no choice in this matter?”
“Do you ever, really?” Lois asked, in complete seriousness.
Clark opened his mouth to answer and, in response, Lois stuck a grape in. He sputtered for a second and, after giving her a dirty look, started eating it.
“So, how was your day?” Lois asked, in a casual tone, even though the question wasn’t the least bit casual. She’d been following the news. She knew there had been fatalities. Clark always took that hard.
Sure enough, he closed his eyes. “It wasn’t… that great.”
“Hhhmmm….” She ran one finger over his lips until he opened his mouth to kiss it and then she used that opportunity to cram another grape in. This time, he just opened one eye to glare at her for a second. “That… sucks.”
“Yeah, well….” Clark got quiet and then he said, “You watched the news?”
Lois nodded, even though she knew he couldn’t see her. Lightly, she began stroking one hand through his hair, massaging gently. “You can’t win them all, Smallville. You know that.”
Clark opened his eyes and stared into hers for a moment. “Yeah, well. Knowing that and accepting it are two totally different things.” Before he stopped talking, Lois snuck another grape into his mouth. He seemed to be dealing with it better, because he didn’t even notice this time. He just took a moment to eat and then swallowed, saying, “Every time, it hurts just as much as it did the first time I couldn’t save someone.”
Since she’d pretty much depleted their supply of grapes, Lois took some time to peel an orange. While doing so, she started asking him questions designed to let him relive the day and give her all the details he needed to get it out of his system. She’d found, over the past year, that this helped deal with the trauma he saw on a daily basis. Somehow, talking it out and going over things he’d done helped him stop asking if he could have done anything differently. While he talked, she sectioned off an orange and fed it to him, piece by piece. By the time he was finished talking, he was clearly exhausted and she’d gone through most of their fruit basket.
Finally, Lois brushed her lips against his and murmured, “Smallville, you did everything you could. You lost some people, but you saved so many more.”
For a second he didn’t say anything, and then he opened his eyes again, looking at her with a smile. “Thank you.”
“For what?” Lois asked, with some confusion.
“For dinner,” he answered teasingly. “And for….” Clark paused and then finished, “For being here. I love you, Lois.”
Lois smiled back. “And I love you.”
Clark walked into the kitchen, while wiping his hands on the dirty towel he’d brought from the barn. He’d thought that working on the tractor would help clear his mind, but – instead – all it had done was leave him to dwell on his conflicted thoughts. The normally soothing activity had seemed pointless and he’d given up.
“You’re back,” Lana said, as she closed the oven door and straightened. She gave him a tremulous smile, which didn’t quite reach her eyes. “How’s the tractor?”
Clark looked at her for a moment and then answered, tersely. “It’s fine.” He felt bad when the smile dropped from her lips and she looked sad. So, he added, in a softer tone, “I doubt I’ll ever get it to work. But I can’t help but try.”
Letting out a mirthless laugh, Lana shook her head. “Sounds like you’re talking about more than the tractor, Clark.”
“What?” Confused, for a second, Clark just stared at her. Then, he realized she was referring to their relationship and he let out a sigh. “No, that’s not what I --.”
“It’s okay, Clark,” Lana interjected. She took the dishtowel that rested on the island and started twisting it in her hands. “I know it’s hard, but… I want you to know that I’m trying. As much as I can.”
“I know you are, Lana,” Clark answered, letting out a weary sigh. “I just….”
Clark stopped, because he wasn’t exactly sure how to complete the sentence. What did he want to say, anyway? Every fiber in his being just wanted to wrap his arms around her and tell her it was going to be all right. That they could get past this, just like they’d gotten past every other obstacle. But his legs wouldn’t move and his arms remained stiff at his side. Something was stopping him, and he had no clue what it was.
Lana seemed to recognize his inner turmoil. She looked up at him with wide, anxious, eyes. “Clark. I love you. That has to count for something.”
“It does.” Clark glanced around the immaculate and spotless kitchen, avoiding her gaze. He saw two pies resting on the counter and he decided to change the subject. “You made pie?”
Seeming to sense that he didn’t want to talk about their relationship, Lana nodded and attempted levity. “Yes. Your mom’s recipe. I know you love her apple pie, but I felt like blueberry. So, I made both!” Again, she smiled at him, but it was clearly forced. “They should be cool now, if you want a slice.”
“No, I’m not hungry,” Clark responded, almost automatically.
A flash of pain flickered in her eyes. “But I made it for you.”
Feeling bad that he’d hurt her feelings, he amended, “Um, maybe later. We haven’t even had dinner, yet.”
Before Lana could answer, there was a loud knocking on the door. It was followed by Lois’s voice, calling out, “People, I’m coming in. And there better be pants on everyone!” In her typical style, Lois pushed the door open and came barging in, talking a mile a minute. “Because, seriously, the last thing I need is that mental image seared into my retinas. So, fair warning, folks!”
“Lois, hi!” Lana offered Lois a genuine smile, with a slightly relieved expression.
“Lois.” Clark gave his friend an exasperated look. Other people entered a room. Lois? She made an entrance. “What are you doing here?”
“Gee, thanks.” Lois made a face. And then she held up a drill. “I came to return your drill.” With a proud grin directed towards Lana, she added, “I managed to put the chair together all by myself. See, Smallville? I told you that I didn’t need you.”
With a little laugh, Clark took the drill from her hands and made a show of looking it over for any damage.
“Hey! I took good care of it!” Lois exclaimed indignantly. “I told you I would.”
“Just checking,” Clark answered, with a grin. “Last time you borrowed something from my tool set, I got it back in four pieces.”
Lois rolled her eyes and ignored the barb. Mainly because she knew that he was right.
“Lois, do you want some pie?” Lana offered, with a gracious smile. She had clearly slipped into her hostess demeanor. “There’s plenty.”
“No, no, I’m good,” Lois responded, holding her hand up. But Lana had already started to take down the plates and to take out forks. So, Lois relented. “Um… okay, just a little.” She slid into the closest stool at the kitchen island.
“Which one do you want? I’ve made apple and blueberry.” The pie knife was Lana’s hand and she stood near the counters, looking at Lois with an expectant expression.
“Ahh…” It was clear Lois was taken aback that there was a choice. “I guess I’ll take the apple.”
Lana furrowed her brows in disappointment. “Are you sure? I picked the blueberries myself.”
“Oh, well, then, I guess I’ll --.”
“If she wanted blueberry, she would have asked for blueberry,” Clark cut in, before he could stop himself. With a tight smile in Lana’s direction, he added, “Most people know what they want and don’t need someone to explain to them what they want.”
Lana froze in place for a second, and then she returned his smile. Hers was equally tense. “Maybe she’s not aware of the options and she’s confused. Sometimes, it can be hard to know what you want and what you need. It’s not always such an easy choice.”
“Sometimes, it is an easy choice,” Clark shot back, now starting to feel annoyance get the better of him. “You just have to want to make it, Lana.”
Lois, whose head had been swiveling back and forth between them, chose that moment to intercede. “OK, THEN! You know what, guys? I’ll have both. I’ll just run an extra mile tomorrow. No biggie.”
Lana and Clark both blinked at her, having almost forgotten she was there. Lana let out a sigh. “Sure, I can give you both.”
There was silence in the room as Lana focused on getting slices of pie onto everyone’s plates and setting the kitchen island. While Lois took her first bit, Lana poured lemonade into three glasses and set them out, too.
After a moment, Lois looked up and said to Lana, with a warm smile, “It’s great, Lana. Now, I’m not going to say it’s as good as Mrs. Kent’s – because that’s the gold standard – but it’s up there.” Quickly, she took a sip of her lemonade and then shot Clark a curious look. “Smallville, aren’t you going to have any?” She gestured towards his untouched plate.
“Yeah, of course.” Clark forced a smile to his lips and took a small bite of the apple pie. It probably was good – Lana was an excellent cook – but, in that moment, it tasted like sawdust. But, out loud, he just said, “It’s good.”
Lana smiled at him and took a small bite of her own blueberry pie.
An awkward silence descended on the room, as Lois quickly shoveled down her pie. Both Lana and Clark were moving their dessert around in their plates more than they were eating it.
Since Clark was very familiar with the fact that Lois hated uncomfortable silences, he wasn’t surprised when she broke the silence to ask, “So, you guys planning any vacations this year? Any summer plans? The weather has been so horrible that I find the only thing keeping me sane is thinking about my bikini and where it’s going this summer.”
“I was thinking we could go to Paris,” Lana answered, slowly.
Clark blinked at her in confusion. This was the first he’d heard of this. “I don’t know. Maybe.”
“Why not, Clark?” Lana asked him, looking a bit annoyed. “I mean, I think it would be good for us to get away from here. From Smallville. It could do us some good.”
“I just don’t think it’s a good idea,” Clark answered, uneasily. “There’s the farm, so much to do.” He shrugged instead of finishing the rest, which was to say that he still had to figure out the situation with his powers. He couldn’t just up and run off on an impromptu vacation whenever he felt like it. “It’s not a good time.”
“When is a good time, Clark?” Lana voice had cooled by about a thousand degrees. “It’s never a good time.”
At that point, Lois jumped up from the island. “Smallville. Can I see you in the other room, for a second?” Without waiting for him to respond, she shot a big grin towards Lana, and almost forcibly dragged him into the living room.
“What?” Clark asked, when they’d finally come to a halt. He stared down at her in confusion.
Lois crossed her arms and looked up at him. “Look, Clark, I have no idea what’s going on between you two.” She held her hand up to cut him off before he could explain. “No, wait. As your friend, I’m telling you that you should take the girl to Paris.”
Clark let out a frustrated sound. “Lois. You have no idea --.”
“Look, Clark,” Lois interjected. “I know you don’t realize this, but I’m a girl.”
Clark almost snorted in amusement. He gave her a mock incredulous look. “No. Really?”
Lois made a face, as though she knew she’d walked into that one. “Anyway… I know that girls like to be romanced and wooed. Don’t just shut her out; if you want to keep her, try to give her what she wants.”
Clark gazed down at her suspiciously. “Since when do you care if I make things work with Lana?”
Something indefinable flashed in her eyes. After a second, it was gone and she was smiling at him again. And she said, smoothly, “I’m your friend. And friends don’t let friends go around making dumb decisions.” With a slight shrug, she leaned in and said, teasingly, “Besides, any girl that makes pie like that is definitely a keeper.” With a light punch to his arm, she moved past him to go out the front door. “See you around, Smallville.”
Hours after Lois had left, Clark lay down on the bed he shared with Lana, after trying to work himself into an exhaustion. It had been a futile effort, because sleep still proved elusive. He stretched out on his side of the bed and listened to the even breathing of the woman that lay next to him. There was only three feet of distance between them, but it may as well have been three miles. He wouldn’t reach out to touch her and he knew that she’d spend the whole night clinging to her edge of the bed, careful not to accidentally breach the distance between them.
As he stared at the moonlight streaking slates of light across his ceiling, his thoughts turned to his conversation with Lois and the advice she’d given him. After mulling it over, he let out a silent laugh and shook his head. He couldn’t believe he was actually considering taking romantic advice from Lois, of all people. She not only had a tendency to gravitate towards the worst possible men in the universe, she was also incapable of making a commitment to the one decent man she had found.
Feeling oddly comforted by the random thoughts about his aggravating friend, he fell asleep to the thought that it would be a cold day in hell before his love life would actually be impacted by Lois Lane’s opinion.
February 2011
Clark walked into the kitchen and did a double take. The place looked like a tornado of flour had been through it. Every available surface was covered with the white stuff and there were stacks of dishes in the sink, along with sugar and all kinds of baking materials spread out everywhere. Lois, herself, seemed to wearing as much flour as the kitchen.
“Lois?” Clark asked, feeling more than a little apprehensive. “What are you doing?”
She turned to face him, after shutting the door of the oven shut with her hip, and gave him a bright grin. “I’m baking a pie!” Lois announced.
“Okay….” Taking a deep breath, Clark mentally reviewed the events of the past twenty-four hours. Had he accidentally inhaled some form of Kryptonite again? Had she inhaled some form of Kryptonite? Was she on drugs?
Lois seemed to sense his fear, because she made a face and said, reassuringly, “No, it’s not like that. I’m making a pie to celebrate!”
“Celebrate what?” Clark asked, still dubious about her motives.
“We got out of the basement!” Lois ran up to him and gave him a hug, along with a quick kiss. Clark glanced down at his clothes and saw that he now wore quite a bit of her flour. “Perry just told me today.”
“We did?” Clark grinned down at her. Not that he cared all that much. It was a bigger deal for Lois to get out of the bullpen than it had been for Clark. But anything that made Lois’s eyes light up and sparkle like that definitely made him happy. “That’s great.” Casting a confused glance around the room again, he asked, “So you decided to celebrate by… baking a pie?”
“Not just any pie.” Lois pulled back and walked backwards towards the oven. Whirling around, she grabbed the oven mitts and opened the door, yanking out the oven rack. Taking the pie out of the oven, she held it up to him. “I got the recipe from your mom. It’s her apple pie you love so much.”
Clark leaned closer and analyzed the pie she held up. It looked normal. It actually wasn’t an interesting shade of charcoal, like most of Lois’s baking efforts usually were. But he couldn’t help but say, “Um… you really didn’t need to do that. We could have gone out for dessert….”
“Very funny, Smallville.” Lois made a face and set the pie down on a cooling rack. “I would have made you my famous rum cake, but someone doesn’t appreciate it as much as he should.”
“Lois, the pigs don’t appreciate your famous rum cake,” Clark pointed out, his lips curved into a wicked grin. “And they eat dirt.”
Lois rolled her eyes in response. Taking the pie knife in her left hand, she started cutting a couple of slices out.
“What are you doing?” Clark’s eyes widened in alarm. Was Lois actually serious about them having to eat it? At her dirty look, he amended, “I mean, it’s hot. We should wait until it cools down.”
Lois’s brows rose at that. “Clark, you’re impervious to pain. And you have super-breath. Just cool it down.”
Not finding any argument to that kind of logic, Clark just nodded. “Right.” Before taking a bite of it, though, he looked her over. He couldn’t help but trail a couple of fingers over her cheek and show her the flour. “Did you bake the pie or decide to take a bath in it?”
Lois looked at his fingers with some surprise. And then glanced down at her apron and messy jeans. “Um… I didn’t realize that.” She started to take off her apron and when the knot wouldn’t untie, she looked up at him. “A little help, please?”
Clark put his arms around to reach the knot and attempted to unravel it, but it was tied on tight. If he pulled more, he’d probably end up ripping it. “I can’t. Can I just tear it?”
“No!” Lois pulled back and tried to swipe his hands away. “It’s your mom’s.”
“I don’t think she’ll care, Lois,” Clark answered, giving the apron’s sash an experimental tug, with a grin. That brought her closer to him, flush up against his body. Suddenly, he wasn’t thinking about aprons and apple pie, anymore. “Let me help you out of it,” he said, in a husky whisper, as he leaned down to give her a kiss.
Lois pulled away before his lips could touch hers. “No way.” She gave him admonishing look and put her fingers on his mouth. “I know that look. It’s usually followed up by a trip upstairs that lasts for hours.”
“You say that like it’s a bad thing,” Clark responded, in a semi-teasing tone.
“I made you pie and you’re going to eat it,” Lois informed him. “It’s not every day that I actually exert myself to bake, you know.”
Considering her for a moment, Clark glanced down at the pie and then back at her. Before she could protest, he took the hand she still had placed on his mouth and guided it down until it hit his plate. Using his own hand to guide her, he scooped up some of the pie onto her fingers and then lifted them to his mouth. Slowly, he licked the filling off of her fingers, sucking on each of them for a second before letting her go. Never taking his eyes off of hers, he said, thoughtfully, “Best pie I’ve ever had.”
Lois let out an incoherent response and then, flushing a bit, cleared her throat. “Um….” Using her free hand, she took a forkful of pie and tried it. After a second of chewing, she coughed. “Smallville, there’s not enough sugar. And I think I went overboard with the salt.”
“Really?” Clark took some more of the pie in his own hand and then left a trail of the gooey filling down the side of her neck, leading down to the hollow of her throat. “Maybe it just tastes sweeter when it’s coming from you. I should check.” Without waiting for her response, he leaned down and licked all the way down until he’d cleaned every last inch off of her. She closed her eyes and swayed closer to him, her hands sliding up his chest and around his shoulders. “Hhhmm… no, still the best pie I’ve ever had.”
At that, Lois opened her eyes and pulled back. A smile playing around her lips, her eyes were sparking mischievously, as she shook her head. “Okay, then. Just rip it off.”
Clark didn’t wait for another invitation. With one arm, he grasped her around the waist and, with his free hand, he grabbed the pie off of the counter. Before she could let out a sound, he super-sped her up the stairs.
Hours later, Lois was snuggled into him and sleeping peacefully. Her head rested on his shoulder and her hand was splayed across his chest. Every once in awhile, she mumbled something inaudible and burrowed in closer, but didn’t wake up. Clark’s thoughts turned to how much she meant to him and he tried to imagine life without her. And realized that just the mere idea gave him chills.
Slowly and softly, so as not to wake her, Clark reached out and pulled open the drawer of his side table. From there, he pulled out a small, velvet box. Contemplating it for a second, he glanced down and saw that Lois was still sound asleep. Quickly, he snapped it open and pulled out the diamond ring that was nestled inside. The stone caught the meager light in the room and reflected it. Clark studied it and smiled, thinking about how excited his mother had been when she’d given it to him a week ago.
Lois’s left hand was resting on his chest and Clark shifted until he could grasp it with his free hand. He wasn’t exactly sure what got into him, but he had a compelling urge to see what she looked like wearing the ring. Since Lois was a pretty sound sleeper, he could probably slide it on and off without her being any the wiser.
After he’d put it on her ring finger, he felt a flare of possessiveness and pride. Both of which were probably emotions that Lois would kill him for having. Especially the first one. But he couldn’t help it. At that moment, as though she sensed that he was having thoughts she wouldn’t approve of, Lois woke up. Before he could grab the ring, she’d moved her hand away and was sitting up to blink down at him sleepily.
“Smallville?” Lois gazed down at him questioningly. “Why aren’t you asleep?”
“Um….” Involuntarily, his gaze strayed to her left hand.
And, then, of course, so did hers. Her eyes widened, almost comically, and she sat up all the way. She held up her hand, so she could stare at the ring. Swallowing a bit, she turned to look at him. “Is this a….?”
“I can explain,” Clark said, hastily, while he tried to figure out a way to explain.
Lois looked amused. “Am I to assume, then, that my opinion is actually irrelevant? Were you even planning on inviting me to the wedding?”
“Lois….” Clark opened his mouth to get her to understand, but then realized he had absolutely no explanation. So, he fell silent and held his breath, waiting for her response.
After a beat, Lois let out a laugh. And then leaned down to kiss him lightly. “Most girls would kill me for letting you off this easy. But, yes. I’ll marry you.”
Clark let out a huge sigh of relief. And then grabbed her to pull her down so he could kiss her more properly. As he flipped her over, so he was on top of her, a stray thought passed through his mind. About how – really – her opinion was the only one that was relevant, at all.
***
May 2009
Lois walked into the bullpen and saw that Clark was actually, amazingly, sitting at his desk. She couldn’t believe it. Shaking her head slightly, she walked up to him and plopped herself down on his desk, facing his chair. “Smallville, where the hell have you been?”
Clark gave her one of his inscrutable looks. The ones she was slowly coming to hate. Actually, quite quickly coming to hate. “Clark, what’s going on?” Lois asked, abruptly.
He looked surprised by her bluntness. “I don’t know what you mean.”
“Yeah, you do, Clark,” Lois answered, with an impatient sound. “You… you’ve been acting weird. And I never know where you are. I had to follow four stories on my own; you were nowhere to be found.”
Clark stood up and snapped, “Lois, we don’t have to be joined at the hip. And I haven’t been acting weird.”
Lois hadn’t been raised on army bases her whole life for nothing. Undaunted by his response, she crossed her arms and followed him to the coffee table. “You’ve totally been acting weird. At least, weird for you. And, yes, your bar is pretty high.”
Instead of eliciting a smile or even a pointed groan from him, it made him turn to face her and he said, testily, “Okay, then. Why don’t you leave to my weirdness?”
“Clark.” Lois tilted her head to the side and decided to take another approach. “Look, I can tell something’s bothering you. Why don’t you just talk to me about it? Maybe I can help you,” she added gently, putting her hand on his shoulder.
Clark stood still for a minute, his back turned to her. Then, he slowly turned around, and his face was a bit wooden as he said, “Lois, I am worried about something. But it’s none of your business.”
“Of course.” Feeling a flash of pain in her heart, Lois blinked away the sudden tears that had come to her eyes. Stepping back, as though he’d physically struck her, she took a deep breath and forced a bright smile to her lips.
His eyes filling with regret, Clark reached out to her and said, “Wait. I didn’t mean it like that.”
“No, you know,” Lois cut in, walking backwards away from him, her hands held up in the air. “Fair enough. I’ve actually been doing great with the solo assignments and, so, I think you’re right. You mind your business. I’ll mind mine.”
Without waiting for his response, Lois whirled around and hurried towards the steps, taking them two at a time as she left the bullpen – and Clark – behind. And, not for the first time, cursed herself for having the misfortune to fall in love with the one guy on the planet who was completely incapable of loving her back.
Hours later, she was tossing and turning in her bed when her phone rang. Frowning slightly, she checked the clock and saw that it was one in the morning. “What the hell?” She grabbed the phone on her bedside table and said, in a harsher tone than she usually employed, “Hello?”
There was silence for a second and then she heard a mechanical voice say, “Ms. Lane?”
Lois sat up the bed, a smile spreading across her face. “Yes? It’s you!”
There was a slight chuckle – or what Lois assumed to be a chuckle – and he confirmed. “Yes. It is.”
Even though it was ridiculous, since she knew he couldn’t see her, Lois ran her fingers through her hair, as though to fix it. “Um… so… what’s up?” Lois asked, a little lamely.
“Well, you said that if I ever just wanted to talk….”
“Yes,” Lois answered, breathlessly. She nodded and then remembered he couldn’t see her. “Um… yeah.”
“So, the offer’s still open?”
Lois grinned happily. “Of course. I’m right here.”
“Thanks.”
A silence stretched between them and then, finally, Lois prompted him. “So, what did you need to talk about?”
“I’m….” He hesitated and then he said, “What would you do if you knew someone who was making a terrible mistake? But if you tried to stop them, it would probably just make things worse?”
“Umm….” Lois blinked. That was probably the most vague hypothetical question she’d ever gotten in her life. “It depends. Is this mistake only going to hurt them? Or will it hurt other people, too?”
“It could hurt a lot of people.”
“Then, I would try to do everything in my power to stop them from making this mistake.” Lois paused and then added, thoughtfully, “Even if it meant that I wouldn’t have a relationship with that person anymore. Because saving people is more important than just one person.”
He was quiet for a minute and then he said, “Ms. Lane?”
“Yes?”
“You’re a really good person.”
Lois flushed and her heart flipped around in her chest. “Thanks, but you don’t really know me.”
“I know you.” He said and then he let out a little laugh. “And I know you don’t like compliments. But you are. I wanted you to know that.”
“Thank you.” Lois was touched and didn’t really know what else to say.
“All right, well, I should let you get back to sleep.”
“It’s okay, I was up,” Lois lied, smoothly.
He chuckled again. “I also know when you’re lying. Good night, Ms. Lane.”
“Good night,” Lois whispered.
Lois held the phone for a good minute or two even after she’d heard the click signaling that he’d hung up. Then, slowly, she turned it off and put it back down on her nightstand. Unbidden, a tear slowly ran down her cheek as she realized something.
She’d fallen in love with a man who was there, right in front of her, but emotionally unavailable. And, now, there was another man, who was ready to open up to her, but physically unavailable.
Letting out a dry laugh, Lois fell back against the pillow and told herself that she was dumbest person in the world. No wonder love was so elusive. She was hopeless.
May 2011
After typing up the final sentence of her article, Lois smiled in satisfaction at another story completed. She clicked on the print button so she could proof the draft in hard copy and then squinted when she saw a window pop up, telling her she had a new e-mail. She clicked on the mouse again, to pull it up and frowned when she saw that it was from Clark. The frown quickly turned into a grin when she read the message. Turn around.
Swiveling her chair around, Lois bit back a smile when she saw Clark standing a few feet away. He was holding a single red rose in his hand and his own smile widened when he saw her. Bounding to her feet, she closed the distance between them.
“For me?” Lois asked, indicating towards the rose.
“No. Actually, it’s for my fiancée,” Clark answered, in a mock serious tone. “Have you seen her?”
“No, I haven’t,” Lois responded, playing along. She grabbed the rose from him and buried her nose in its fragrance. “But I’m sure she won’t mind if I steal it from her.”
“Hhhmm… I don’t know.” Clark pretended to give it some thought. “She’s pretty feisty.”
One brow rose, as she appraised him over the flower. “Feisty? Really?”
Clark laughed. And then pulled her in for a hug. Lois snuggled into the warmth of his embrace for about thirty seconds and then moved back, since they were at the DP and it wasn’t a good idea to indulge in PDAs too much.
Gazing up at him, she gave him a proper greeting. “Hello.”
“Hi.” Clark stuck his hands in his pockets and stared down at her for a second and then asked, “So, we’re still on for tonight?”
Lois nodded. “Yup. You and me. Candlelight dinner.”
“Good.” Clark let out a relieved sigh. “This is the first meal we’ll have together in two weeks.”
“Two and a half,” Lois corrected him. And then gave him a wry smile. “Not that I’m keeping track.”
Clark opened his mouth to respond, but then he stopped. His head turned sharply to the side and he got that look on his face that Lois had become increasingly familiar with. Sure enough, he snapped out of it a few seconds later and turned to her with an apologetic look. “I hear police sirens and the ambulance. I better go check it out.”
“Of course.” In the amount of time it took to get the words out, Clark had already disappeared. With a bit of a sigh, she glanced down at the rose in her hand and added, “No problem.” Then she frowned, as she saw that there was a paper stuck to the stem of the rose.
She brought it closer and realized that Clark had wrapped a post-it around the stem, and there was something written on it. Taking care not to rip it, she pulled it away from the stem. And then smiled when she saw what he’d written.
It’s a beautiful rose. But the woman holding it is even more beautiful. I love you, Lois Lane.
Shaking her head slightly, she let out an embarrassed laugh. Her cheeks heated up as she looked around, hoping no one saw the very goofy expression on her face. The DP was, as usual, a whirlwind of activity, so no one was paying the least bit attention to her. Indulging herself, for just a moment, Lois lifted the rose and brushed it against her lips. And then whispered, “I love you, too, Clark Kent.”
Many hours later, she sat in the living room and flipped through the channels, anxiously trying to catch up with the news and trying to figure out where Clark was. The dinner had grown cold, long ago, and the candles had sputtered out. But she wasn’t focused on that. She was focused on trying to figure out where Clark had gone after he’d put out the fire, saved the people from the falling bridge, and then went over to Florida to help folks out with the hurricane.
Just as she was reaching for her phone to call Clark – even though she had a rule where she wouldn’t bother him while he was on Blur duties – she heard the front door open behind her. Letting out a huge sigh of relief, she jumped to her feet and whirled around to face him. And then blinked in dismay. He looked like he’d been through the ringer. His costume was filthy and dusty, with water stains. And he looked exhausted.
“Smallville!” Lois exclaimed and then hurried towards him. She threw her arms around him and he hugged her back. Pulling away, she said, “Um… don’t take this the wrong way, but you look like hell.” Then she wrinkled her nose. “You don’t smell all that great, either.”
“Gee, thanks.” Clark rolled his eyes. “There was a fire and then a bridge collapsed. And, then --.”
“The hurricane,” Lois interjected. “Yeah, I know.” Looking him up and down critically, she arrived an executive decision. “You go upstairs and shower; get changed. I’ll heat up the food I saved for you.”
“Lois, I’m not hungry,” Clark protested. “I just want to go to bed.”
Lois pursed her lips and glared at him. “I don’t care. You haven’t eaten since breakfast this morning. With your metabolism, you need to eat like a gazillion times a day. Just go upstairs, get changed, and I’ll put something together.” She gave him one of those looks where she made it clear that he may be the strongest person in the world, but she was the stubbornest.
Letting out a sigh of defeat, he blurred away to go change.
Minutes later, he came back downstairs, right as she was pulling his food out of the microwave. He glanced down at the roast and potatoes and made a face. “There is no way I’m eating that.”
Tilting her head to the side, she studied him for a moment. His eyes were a deeper green than usual and he looked incredibly tired. It was clear that he’d had a long and hard day. She chewed on her lip for a second and then, inspired, she grabbed the fruit bowl from the kitchen counter with one hand and grasped his hand with the other.
“Follow me,” Lois ordered, while pulling him into the living room.
Either Clark was too confused to argue or too tired but, either way, he complied without protest. It took some maneuvering, but Lois managed to settle down on the sofa, yanking Clark down at the same time, until he was lying down with his head resting comfortably on her lap and wedged under a cushion.
Finally, Clark looked up at her and asked, “What are we doing?”
“I’m going to feed you grapes,” Lois announced. She eyed the fruit bowl. “Um… and oranges. That way you don’t have to do any work.”
One corner of his mouth lifted up in a wry smile. “I take it I have no choice in this matter?”
“Do you ever, really?” Lois asked, in complete seriousness.
Clark opened his mouth to answer and, in response, Lois stuck a grape in. He sputtered for a second and, after giving her a dirty look, started eating it.
“So, how was your day?” Lois asked, in a casual tone, even though the question wasn’t the least bit casual. She’d been following the news. She knew there had been fatalities. Clark always took that hard.
Sure enough, he closed his eyes. “It wasn’t… that great.”
“Hhhmmm….” She ran one finger over his lips until he opened his mouth to kiss it and then she used that opportunity to cram another grape in. This time, he just opened one eye to glare at her for a second. “That… sucks.”
“Yeah, well….” Clark got quiet and then he said, “You watched the news?”
Lois nodded, even though she knew he couldn’t see her. Lightly, she began stroking one hand through his hair, massaging gently. “You can’t win them all, Smallville. You know that.”
Clark opened his eyes and stared into hers for a moment. “Yeah, well. Knowing that and accepting it are two totally different things.” Before he stopped talking, Lois snuck another grape into his mouth. He seemed to be dealing with it better, because he didn’t even notice this time. He just took a moment to eat and then swallowed, saying, “Every time, it hurts just as much as it did the first time I couldn’t save someone.”
Since she’d pretty much depleted their supply of grapes, Lois took some time to peel an orange. While doing so, she started asking him questions designed to let him relive the day and give her all the details he needed to get it out of his system. She’d found, over the past year, that this helped deal with the trauma he saw on a daily basis. Somehow, talking it out and going over things he’d done helped him stop asking if he could have done anything differently. While he talked, she sectioned off an orange and fed it to him, piece by piece. By the time he was finished talking, he was clearly exhausted and she’d gone through most of their fruit basket.
Finally, Lois brushed her lips against his and murmured, “Smallville, you did everything you could. You lost some people, but you saved so many more.”
For a second he didn’t say anything, and then he opened his eyes again, looking at her with a smile. “Thank you.”
“For what?” Lois asked, with some confusion.
“For dinner,” he answered teasingly. “And for….” Clark paused and then finished, “For being here. I love you, Lois.”
Lois smiled back. “And I love you.”
